How to deal with your breakup? Letting go of someone is a scary thing to tackle. I spent a lot of time observing why people stay in relationships or interact so horribly. It is a pity that I have to admit that I have seen much more unhappy and ill-fitting relationships than usual. This is why I can’t imagine breaking the soul is so devastating.
In reality, people are emotional beings. This statement includes men no matter how emotionally deficient they seem to be. We all fall for the wrong one at least once in our lives and when the dike breaks, let’s digest.
There are many reasons why even couples who clearly shouldn’t have been together can split up. It is possible that the two did not have the same level of understanding or dedication. There are plenty of ways to interpret the meaning of a relationship, and unless it is properly communicated, one of you will likely be terribly blind later.
It can be the disturbing and selfish fear that they will find someone better. I know a handful of girls, and even a few boys, who have stayed in a relationship because they don’t want their partner to find anyone else. It’s not because they want to keep their significant others under lock and key, because they feel like they’ve hit gold. It’s because they don’t want to feel failures while their partner goes out and may succeed in the dating world. That makes us wonder, “Well, why didn’t it work for me?” Unless you’re ready to think seriously about that adult question, don’t dwell on it.
What I find most is that you are now back to square one, you are alone. You don’t have that security blanket; no one to call if you’re bored or sad. They are not there to guide you in uncomfortable situations or to be your date for special occasions. Now you have to learn to live as a person again without the extra limbs. You have to learn how to feel comfortable and you have to do it yourself.
You will also be placed back in the single world. Although a beautiful and majestic place, it can be the equivalent of the Ministry of Motor Vehicles straight from a relationship: pushy people, frustration and long waiting times. Depending on how long you’ve been in the game, this can be a nightmare. I have that problem now after splitting up with my boyfriend for almost three years recently and I only seem to appeal to creeps. If someone else has this problem, you are not alone and you remain strong.
It is important to accept one of the two truths, if not both, when you release someone, be it a friend, girlfriend or just a friend. Let’s face it, breaking up between friends can be much more catastrophic than intimate relationships.
One is that you are sure that you have given the relationship everything. You have made every effort to give this person all the fibers of your being, so even if you split up, you have no regrets. There is no doubt that you could have done anything more to save the union and hit yourself over it. Sometimes things just don’t work or weren’t meant to, and it doesn’t have to be someone’s fault. Get what you can out of the experience and appreciate the memories.
The second truth is that the other no longer wanted to give everything. That stings and I know it does, but it hurts less than being treated like dirt later. In my opinion, the only thing worse than being cheated is dated out of pity. So which means that your significant other was too much of a chicken * to let you know they checked out mentally to go out with you and themselves, not you, the theatria saves.
You cannot change anyone who does not want to change and you cannot let someone do something unintentionally. Even if they want to change, it is not your job or your responsibility to do it for them. If this is the case, count your lucky stars before the breakup and be thankful that you were released when you did. Nobody deserves someone who does not at least care about them. Not me, not you and not even the blockhead you were dating.
It takes a lot of energy and time to break through the routine of a relationship, as well as the overall attachment you have to that person; that attachment is perfectly justified and usually inevitable. Life may seem unbearable during this period because “everything” we knew is now gone. In reality, this is not all you have ever known, so you have to step back from the ledge and reduce the drama.
You lived before you loved and you will live after you loved. Believe it or not, you go on and love again. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t love them anymore either, but you should keep going so someone who deserves your love more, can come by and seize the opportunity that you are.
I firmly believe in honesty, because girls can destroy boys as easily as boys can destroy girls. My ex-boyfriend calls me a truck driver because I drove over his heart with an 18-wheeler. Is it a smart label? Absolutely. Am I proud of it? Certainly not. But we let each other go as a potential romantic interest and we’ve been best friends ever since.
I don’t encourage anyone to go out right now and find a life partner, but if you’re actively looking for a relationship with someone, you need enough sh * t give to make it work. Don’t worry because you’re wasting everyone’s time.
If life has taught us nothing else, it has taught us that time is precious. So even if you spend a lot of that time alone, do everything possible to enjoy it.